The Road Back
by happysunshine01
Summary: AU. In the midst of her family drama, JJ's life is forced to change when she experiences the loss of innocence, trust and her self-worth. And everyone she cares about goes on without noticing that JJ has changed forever and that she might never be herself again. After the tragedy JJ needs to find the road back to who she once was but it might take a lifetime to go back.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I decided to post this first chapter because I am curious about the response to this story. So let me know what you think.

I don't own criminal minds!

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If I am what I have and if I lose what I have who then am I?

~Erich Fromm

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**Chapter 1: Just the beginning**

JJ's body kept shaking as she sat in her chair. She didn't say a word. She couldn't speak because the anger and shock was immobilizing her. Everything had become a haze and nothing seemed real. She knew her father's company was in trouble, she just never expected her family had to move across the country. She didn't want to move. She had a life in East-Allegheny. She had three wonderful friends. Her life was there. She couldn't move. She couldn't lose everything that made her who she was.

As her thoughts kept racing, she tried to keep the tears away. She was never a person to cry in front of other people. She actually never had a reason to cry because she had the perfect life. Until that moment. In that moment her heart was crushed. She felt like screaming out her lungs as her father kept talking. JJ barely registered the words. Her three sisters were sitting around the table as well and they to seemed shocked. Her older sister, Lisa, didn't seem to pay much attention. She had nothing to worry about it. She was about to graduate high school and she would be off to college. Her life wasn't going to change.

''Why?'' JJ asked sadly as a tear finally escaped her eye. ''Why do we have to move? Why move at all?''

Thomas Jareau looked at his daughter who seemed to be in pain and he didn't know what to tell her. His entire world was his family and his support for them was gone. He no longer had a way of making money. The business he spent years building was gone. He had no income to support the people he loved. ''We need the money, JJ. It's not up for discussion right now.'' he said.

JJ sat up in her chair, wiping at the tears that kept streaming down her face. ''How can this not be up for discussion?'' she asked angrily. ''We're talking about my entire life here. My life is here. My friends, my school and everything is here!'' she yelled. ''Don't we have say in this?'' she asked and afterwards a silence fell. She looked around the dining table. Everyone was quiet. Her mother looked emotional and her father didn't appreciate her yelling, but she didn't care. They were talking about her life. Not just something simple but her life. And she just couldn't believe that her sisters didn't say anything. Was she the only one who didn't want to move?

''This isn't about you!'' Thomas said. ''This is about all of us and it's the only way. I am sorry, JJ. There's no other option.''

''I am sorry, JJ.'' Kate Jareau said, seeing the hurt in her daughter's eyes. She wished there were other options but it was the only way. They had to try.

''What am I supposed to tell my friends?'' JJ asked. ''They know something has been going on here. They're not crazy.''

''Make up something! I don't want them know about this situation!'' Kate said immediately. She couldn't live in a small town where everyone would know about their situation. She couldn't live around people who started rumors.

''Are you crazy?'' JJ yelled out. ''Are you really so scared that people will talk about us? I don't care about that. I don't want to lie to my friends anymore, especially if we're moving away.''

''You're not telling anyone!'' Thomas agreed with his wife. He looked around the table and looked at the other three kids who were all quiet during JJ's outburst.

JJ rose from the chair in tears and stormed out of the kitchen. She ran up the stairs and locked herself in the bathroom. Downstairs she heard her parents calling out her name. She ignored everyone around her as her thoughts started to wonder. She didn't want to think about changing schools. Everything was good. She had good grades and she barely had to do anything for it. Her life was perfect exactly the way it was. She didn't want anything to change.

An hour passed and JJ was still locked in the bathroom. She heard a knock on the other side of the door. She closed her eyes in anger, hoping the person would leave. But when she heard the voice, she couldn't stay inside.

''JJ, it's me Lori!'' her friend said in a whisper. ''Your parents called us and said you had something to tell us.''

JJ opened the door to see her three best friends, standing on the other side. She walked out and made her way towards her room, still in tears. Once they were all inside, she sat down on the ground and looked at the shocked faces. ''I really hate my parents for calling you guys.''

Kelly sat down next to JJ. ''What's going on, JJ?'' she asked.

''You can tell us anything.'' Rachel assured. ''It's okay.''

JJ looked at the three caring faces around her and it only made the news she had worse. She couldn't lose her friends. It wasn't an option. Not ever. ''I am moving away.'' she cried out. ''To Springfield, Illinois. It's at least eight hours away.''

She saw the shock on all of their faces. Kelly's eyes had become watery and Lori and Rachel looked at her with question marks. ''I don't know what to say. I don't want to leave.''

''How? Why?'' Lori stuttered.

''Why so sudden?'' Rachel added to the mix.

''My mom and dad want something else, I guess.'' she lied, knowing there was another reason behind their sudden move. ''I am going to miss you three so much!''

The four of them hugged each other as tears kept falling and JJ realized she wasn't going to see her friends every single day and that hurt. She didn't want to lose them. They were her rocks through the tough times. They were always there for each other and now everything was going to change.

The next few hours JJ spent with her friends. They talked about the future and how they weren't going to let anything change. Their friendships would always be the same no matter what happened. But as JJ sat on the ground between her friends, she wished she could talk about the problems her family was experiencing. But in the back of her mind she heard her mother's voice on repeat, telling her she couldn't tell anyone. She wanted to tell her friends about the reason they suddenly had to move, but she also didn't want to get into trouble with her family.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Here's the next chapter. I hope you all like it!

Special thanks to Sophia0665, Westie80, BabyGirl'98x0x, Katia XD and Christiangirl!

I don't own criminal minds!

**Chapter 2: New house**

JJ stepped from the car in anger. It had been a week since her parents announced that they were going to move and leave behind her entire life. She had moved a lot in her teenage years, but she never moved away from her school. She always stayed close to her friends. This time everything was going to be different.

JJ texted Lori before she came home. She was in desperate need to talk to a friend again. She had been gone the entire weekend to look at the house where she was going to live and she hated it. She even told her parents but they didn't seem to care. They said they would consider everyone's opinion but they didn't listen to her. JJ hated them for it. It was the first time in her life that she felt so angry with her parents. Growing up she had everything she could wish for. Her father had enough money to spent. They lived in big houses and had expensive cars, but her family stayed normal. JJ had always been the down to earth girl. Not even the money changed that. She never wanted that to happen.

JJ walked to the front of the house where Lori was waiting for her. JJ smiled once she saw her friend. Her friends meant the world to her. There was never a dull moment with them around.

''Hey!'' JJ greeted happily as she stopped in front of Lori. ''I hope you didn't wait for too long.''

''No, I've been here for five minutes.'' she replied. ''How was Springfield?''

JJ saw down on the small bench that was in the front yard. ''I tried to go there with an open mind but everything just seems off. I feel so horrible right now.''

''I'm so sorry, JJ.'' Lori said sadly. She didn't want to lose one of her best friends. JJ was always the one who cheered her up in the bad times. She was there to talk when her mother turned ill and she supported her through anything. She was a friend for life. ''When are you moving?''

JJ felt herself choke up as she thought about the question. The answer was unimaginable. ''Two weeks from now. We're moving when Christmas break starts in Springfield so he have enough time to get used to the neighborhood before we go to school.'' she answered, looking at the shock in Lori's face. ''I know. It sucks and I know there isn't a way to stop this from happening. My parents have made up their minds and anything I say won't help the situation.''

''What do you sisters want?'' Lori asked as she sat down next to JJ, knowing she was barely holding it together in that moment.

JJ thought about her three sister. She had one older sister, Lisa who was seventeen. And she had two younger sisters. April, who was only ten and Leslie who was thirteen. She knew they didn't mind moving. ''Lisa is going to stay here and live with my grandma because she's graduating in a couple of months and then she's off to college.'' she began. ''I also know that April really doesn't mind. She likes everyone so she makes friends easily and Leslie can't wait to leave because she has had trouble with bullying.''

''So you're the only one who wants to stay here?''

''Yeah,'' she replied. ''I just don't get why my parents have to do all of this in such a hurry. It's like they're running away or something and I wish I could make them stop from doing this.''

Lori looked at her watch and realized she had to go. ''Oh god, I hate to do this but I have to go, JJ.'' she said suddenly. ''My sister came back from college for the weekend and we're all having dinner together.''

''I get it. Go!'' JJ assured. ''I'll see you in school tomorrow!''

''Yeah. Bye, JJ!'' she said before leaving the front yard.

JJ stayed on the bench for a few minutes as she let her thoughts race. Growing up she never had to worry about anything. She was happy and loved by her family. Nothing ever went wrong but now everything seemed to be falling apart. Her father was busy with saving his business and he had hired a lawyer for when they would go to court. And her mother was busy with keeping the secret inside the family. JJ knew she was afraid of what people in the small town would think if they figured out that the once perfect family was slowly falling apart. JJ felt like screaming her lungs out and revealing the truth to the entire world but it seemed irresponsible and she didn't want to deal with her mother.

JJ finally left the bench when she had her thoughts sorted out. She slowly walked to the back of the house and stepped inside the kitchen where her parents were sitting at the dinner table. JJ wanted to walk into the living room and go up to her room. She didn't feel like having another confrontation with her parents.

''Where have you been?'' Thomas asked curiously.

''Lori came by but she had to go home for dinner because her sister is in town.'' she replied as she was about to walk away but her mother cleared her voice.

''Did you say anything?'' Kate asked.

JJ whirled around in anger. She couldn't believe the accusation that came out of her mother's mouth. ''I didn't say a damn thing about the your stupid secret!'' she snapped. ''I didn't, okay!''

Thomas rose from the chair in anger. ''You don't talk to us like that!'' he said. ''We've always given you everything you wanted.''

JJ nodded her head in agreement, but in that moment her feelings were torn. ''I know, dad. And I really love you because you've given me an amazing childhood and that's great.'' she explained. ''But right now, I'm so angry because I don't want to leave. I want to see my friends every day. I want to finish school here.'' she went on. ''I just don't know what to do. So just give me some time alone and don't yell at me!" she said before storming off into the living room. She quickly walked the stairs and ended up in her own bedroom. She dropped to the bed in tears and she tried to calm herself down.


End file.
